Are you afraid of missing out on what you don’t have?
I hope you’re all deep in the throngs of cookie baking and gift-wrapping! Christmas is just 1 WEEK AWAY. Can you believe it?! I sure can’t!
Things are getting deep around here lately.
Have you ever heard of this psychological phenomenon called F.O.M.O, or Fear of Missing Out? I know I didn’t until my mom mentioned something about it to me the other day and I figured it would be the perfect topic for the holiday season.
I’m sure you’re all familiar with “YOLO”, or “You Only Live Once”, the popular phrase for teens and young adults ages around 15-21. For ages 22-29, it’s FOMO. And if you’re older than that, you’re probably confused by all of this terminology. We know you only know the acronym for AARP. 😉 ANYWAY, I did a little research and found that “FOMO is the anxiety created by the constant influx of information on social media informing you that your friends are doing something way more fun than you are”, according to Buzzfeed. It might seem like FOMO is the product of having too many choices, but it’s not the options, it’s the pressure to choose the right one. Let me break it down a bit.
Listen to the Echosmith song, “Cool Kids“. First of all, the title says it all. Gee, I wonder what this song is about? The catchy hook that they repeat over and over again even says, “I wish that I could be like the cool kids”. Let’s face it, we all wanted to be the “cool kids” at some point, right? For me, it was not having a boyfriend when I got to high school like so many of my other girl friends. I wanted a guy to like me because I never really got that attention in middle school like the “popular” girls did. That phase quickly passed after I saw most of my friends go in and out of really immature and dumb relationships that were just for attention. Meanwhile, I’m still happily dating my boyfriend of 5 years. <3 YUP, YOU READ THAT RIGHT.
Most people at one time or another have been preoccupied by the idea that someone, somewhere, is having a better time, making more money, or leading a more exciting life. Lucky for our generation, smartphones and social media have made it easier than ever to track what others are doing. Every single day I browse through Instagram, the blogs I follow, and Facebook and I get to see how other people are doing. Sure, some days I look at Misty Copeland‘s account and want to start stretching because she’s so beautiful and strong. God, my extensions are nowhere NEAR as awesome as hers, maybe I should pay more attention to that and I’ll be a better dancer. This is called COMPARING and it gets you nowhere, trust me. Another common FOMO is also, after seeing a picture on Instagram, “why wasn’t I invited to that party/event? I thought we were friends?! She didn’t even text me!”
Even more:
“Oh my God, I can’t believe she goes on vacations for EVERY BREAK. I hate her.”
“He/She has a rockin’ body. I wonder what their workout routine is?”
“OMG look at that…can I be you?!”
It’s obviously clear that we can’t fully grasp how technology affects our psyches and thoughts. Regardless, it appears that they’re here to stay and it’s up to us as users to figure out where, when, and how often to use these products and services.
Here are a couple suggestions for keeping your gadgets and FOMO urges in check:
- Enjoy feeling out of the loop for a bit. Great things are happening out there and sometimes you’re not invited. That’s okay! Admit that you are missing out and there’s nothing you can do about it.
- Take a hiatus from social media. This one would be really hard for me too, don’t worry! Try staying offline for a day, a week, or maybe even a month. Try waking up to the wonders of the real world and see how you feel. You could also try deleting social media apps from your phone if you really want a challenge.
- Look at what some celebrities think of social media (news sources are linked):
“It has a huge impact on young women’s self-esteem, because all they ever do is design themselves for people to like them. And what comes along with that? Eating disorders. And that makes my blood boil. And is the reason we don’t have any social media in our house.” —Kate Winslet, in The Sunday Times
“I just don’t like this compulsive, instantaneous, over-information, lack-of-privacy, weirdo aspect of the world.” —Drew Barrymore, in Marie Claire UK
“I’d rather have a rectal examination on live TV by a fellow with cold hands than have a Facebook page.” —George Clooney, at the Tortonto Film Festival
Clearly, what we see of others online isn’t a full representation of their lives. Instead, it’s personal social-media marketing, similar to the images of airbrushed models in magazines that highlight and exaggerate only their most positive features. The disappointments, embarrassments, and personal failures, are rarely seen in Facebook posts. The uncomfortable emotion is normal and very common with the arrival of social media tools.
However, understanding the feeling and finding positive ways to deal with it can help us be happier with our own lives without getting wrapped up in a fear that we might be missing out on what the cool kids are doing.
On that note, here’s a photo of me at my most comfortable self. Un-edited, unfiltered, and not worried about missing out on anything. 🙂
BE WELL and have a fantabulous Friday!!!!! 🙂